WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
