Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
