I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
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