I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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