i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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