so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
