i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Houston, we have a blender
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Randomize
