what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
should my penis look like a turkey
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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