at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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