Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
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