Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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