That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Randomize