So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I want her autograph on my taint
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
