Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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