All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
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