She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
