Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
