thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Someone came in the potted fern
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
did you just send me my own nude
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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