id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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