this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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