I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
