Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Randomize
