Apparently you make a good broom.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
