dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
are you so shy because you have an std?
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
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