He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
