were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
