Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I'm way too hungover for life right now
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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