I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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