is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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