All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
