end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Randomize
