Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
