I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
