So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
