anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize