He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
