I am puke
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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