when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
