At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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