honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize