Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
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