ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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