who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Randomize
