is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I'm way too hungover for life right now
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
