You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
