Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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