omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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