1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
