that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
The power of my boobs compel you
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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