a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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