am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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