I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
